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getting ready to go to the club

RIP

i can''t believe he is dead.
i haven't seen him in years
and still everything is going to be different
now that i can't
i can't imagine what his g.f and best friend are feeling
or how jessica taking off her shirt htat was covered in his blood

i guess i should tell the whole story since it sounds like we kill someone

when i was growing up my friend amanda's mom babysat a bunch of kids
so i would go to her house before and after school and my mom would pick me up after work
like my second home
they lived on this tiny street that had like 15 people living on it
so naturally they are all close
Mikey lived down the street from them
Jessica is amandas older sister, she is 2 years older than us and Mikey was a year older than us
after we all grew up we all grew apart and got our own friends
except me and amanda.
jessica and mikey and a bunch of their mutual friends we camping at this place in missouri
they had cliffs you could jump off into the lake
mikey and another guy tristen were on the other side of the lake as everyone else walking down from a cliff
mikey slipped on loose gravel and fell down the hill onto some jagged rocks
jessica and julie (a lifeguard who they are friends with) tim (his best friend) and another guy named mike
swam over to mikey and tristen. they climbed over the rocks and mike and tim picked mikey up and put his head in jessicas lap
julie tried to give him CPR while tim tried to stop the bleeding from his stomach
julie said mikey bit her lip (has a mark to prove it) but he died like less than a minute after that
jessica said his head didnt even feel round anymore.
like his skull was crushed
the parametics said there was no way he could have lived through that.
he was only 20 years old
and not drinking
or on drugs

i dont even know a word to describe the way i am feeling
all i can think about is everyday after school and everyday of the summer growing up
we would all hang out in our club house
and we made fun of him for his giant glasses
and he made fun of us for our spice girls impression
if i am this torn up about it i can't even imagine how his g.f kirsta feels or jessica or julie or tim or his mom or sister

this is going to be a hard week.
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